Psychology’s 8 signs you’ve found your life partner

Psychology’s 8 signs you’ve found your life partner

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Is the person standing in front of you the right one?

The answer to the shower question is… you can’t.

Earth has no magic tricks to tie us to another person forever; no soulmate marks; no way to tell whether your partner will stay by your side forever.

All you need is someone who is truly committed to the relationship, who loves you with all their heart, and who checks most of the boxes below.

According to psychology, these are the 8 signs you’ve found your life partner.

1) Your inner child feels safe

Is it common for you and your partner to talk in cute voices that would scare off an unsuspecting stranger?

Become a member.

Couples who speak in the so-called “baby voice” are actually in a healthy relationship, contrary to popular belief.

Research indicates that couples who sometimes speak in baby voices to each other are more secure and vulnerable.

Showing up as your most vulnerable self allows your inner child to express themselves freely and in a playful way.

This means you don’t fear your partner’s judgment. You know you can be yourself and get the love and affection you deserve.

As a result, your relationship is built on trust, authenticity, and respect, which are all vital components of a long-term relationship.

2) Your core values are in alignment

I’m sure you’ve read this in every dating article on the internet, but it doesn’t make it any less true.

There should be a match between your core values.

It might seem trivial to have a partner whose values differ from yours – after all, you’re both adults who can respect each other’s differences, right?

However, I can tell you from personal experience that eventually, it all piles up.

What’s the reason?

Your values will either shift to match theirs as you fall in love with your partner, live with them, and maybe even marry them, or they will continue to clash until it all becomes too much.

While you don’t have to agree on everything, it’s important to write down your five most important values and ensure your partner is on the same page.

In my last relationship, I didn’t do any of this, and over time, I realized I had distanced myself from my true self.

Your most integral values must align if you want a life partner.

3) You’re best friends

My friendship with one of my exes was quite weak after I got with him.

Our romantic and sexual relationships were great, but our conversations rarely lasted more than twenty minutes.

When we went on a trip, I knew I would have had more fun with one of my girlfriends since we didn’t have much in common.

Maintaining friendships with others alongside your romantic relationship is extremely important. Don’t let your partner be your only best friend.

The leading expert on emotions, Aaron Ben-Zeév Ph.D., says:

“Friendship is not an emotion, but a personal relation necessary for an enduring, flourishing relationship. As friendship is based on shared history, it often grows over time, unlike sexual desire, which fades with time.”

Your life partner shouldn’t just be chosen based on your romantic and sexual connection. Those may eventually fade.

Companionship is what matters most in the long run.

Do you laugh together? Do you go on fun dates? Do you feel heard and understood?

Those are the things that really matter.

4) You both put in consistent effort

To keep a person in your life, you can’t take them for granted and not nurture your relationship.

The importance of this cannot be overstated.

If left untouched, people don’t last for centuries.

A person is like a river, ever-flowing and ever-changing, and the only way you can ensure that they stay by your side is to go where the current takes you. You need to learn how to swim and put that skill to work.

There will be times when you don’t have the energy to go on a date every week. Sure, the relationship won’t always be a priority.

Nevertheless, effort should be the general pattern.

If your partner is having a rough time at work, cook a romantic dinner. Clean the kitchen even if you’re tired, since it’ll make their morning easier. Plan dates and activities.

Make sure you show up.

Do you really want to spend time with your partner if you don’t show up for each other? Or are you just afraid of uncertainty?

The question is, what should I do?

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